As I write this blog I am watching the funeral service of Whitney Houston. Since her death one week ago she has been the topic of constant discussion on Facebook and Twitter. Most comments I have seen have referenced the legacy of music she left behind. I have read the statuses of how she has impacted my friends through her songs and movies. But, as is generally the case when someone who has struggled with substance abuse, I also came across comments about how "this is what happens when _____" and they fill in the blank making assumptions about her death even though no one knows for sure yet what happened. I have seen this before when other celebrities die and even in private conversations following the deaths of people I knew personally.
My heart breaks when I hear such comments, particularly because they almost always come from my Christian friends. For some reason, my church friends often like to take a position of "I told you so" and somehow imply that someone who struggles with sin deserves death. I have a horrible fact for you, we all deserve death because we are all sinners. You see, we are all born into sin and the wages of sin is death. I believe with all my heart that hell is a very real place and spending eternity there is the wage for sin. When our time on earth is done, God will judge us, based not on our good works or how kind or how much we did, but on whether or not we accepted salvation. Because of sin, we are all bound for hell. But you see, I John 2:1 tells us that we have an advocate in Jesus. In today's language, Jesus is like our lawyer. He goes to the judge (God) and makes a way for us. His death on the cross created a sort of loop hole for those who call on His name. Accepting Him into your heart and receiving the salvation He died for ensures that you don't have to endure the punishment you deserve. So you see, to say that someone "got what they deserved" is a horrific comment, because through the love of God, we don't get what we deserve. But for the grace of God, any of us could find ourself in the grips of addiction. I call out to my friends and ask that we stop our judgement and realize that none of us are above these struggles. Indeed, I firmly believe that any of us could be just one illness, surgery, or accident from becoming an addict. We have no space to judge, God is the only judge. But for the grace of God go I (and you). That's the point of grace, it keeps us from getting what we deserve.
I don't know what the condition of her soul was the night of her death any more than any one else does. I do know that she was raised by a mother who clung to Christ with all her might and who raised her child, Whitney, in the "fear and admonition" of the Lord. As I watch this service nearly every person at the pulpit has brought up how often she would mention the Lord, even referring to Him as "my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ". Her last recorded performance was an impromptu retention of Jesus Loves Me just prior to her death. I find it hard to believe that someone who had Jesus so deep in her mind would not have called out to Him in her final hours. I am extremely grateful that we will not be judged by man, who can be so harsh. Praise God that He is the only one who decides where our soul will spend eternity.
Saturday, February 18, 2012
Monday, February 13, 2012
If It's Not Like the Movies, It's Normal
On the 2011 Grammys, pop star Katy Perry sang her song, "Not Like The Movies". She performed on a swing suspended in the air as the video of her fall 2010 wedding to comedian Russell Brand played on the massive train of her dress. The song asserts that when you find "the one" it will be like the fairy tale movies we have all seen and if you haven't found that, then you haven't found your mate and should keep looking. One lyric even states, "Just like the movies/That's how it should be/Cinematic and dramatic with the perfect ending..." She most certainly got a dramatic ending, but it wasn't perfect. By the end of 2011, Brand filed for divorce and just like that the fairy tale she thought she had found crumbled.
So the obvious question is, why am I telling such a depressing story on the eve of Singles Awareness Day (some of you refer to it as Valentine's, but if you are alone on the 14th, the day is just plain SAD)? As a single young woman I am constantly bombarded with messages from the media about what my relationships should be like. The theme of Ms. Perry's song is a common one throughout music and movies. There is this idea that love should be easy, and that's how you know it's real. As a Christian, I can't accept this theory. We all know I Corinthians 13:4-7:
4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
How can love prove itself patient if there are never times of struggle? How can it prove it is kind unless there are moments of frustration? How can it be shown to not be envious, boastful, or proud unless there are instances in which these things are met? To say that love isn't real unless it is flawless is ridiculous. Any relationship, regardless of how much you think God brought you together, is still the meeting of two flawed human beings. Loving a person doesn't mean that times will never be tough, it means that you will stick it out and love each other when your partner seems unloveable. To claim that a relationship isn't worth preserving just because it isn't perfect is childish nonsense and verse 11 of that passage reminds us:
11 When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me.
Don't allow yourself to be deceived by the world's version of what true love is. You know why love is perfect in movies? Because they are characters, not real people, and their stories are scripted. The measure of real love isn't that every scenario turns out beautifully, love is real because it never fails.
So the obvious question is, why am I telling such a depressing story on the eve of Singles Awareness Day (some of you refer to it as Valentine's, but if you are alone on the 14th, the day is just plain SAD)? As a single young woman I am constantly bombarded with messages from the media about what my relationships should be like. The theme of Ms. Perry's song is a common one throughout music and movies. There is this idea that love should be easy, and that's how you know it's real. As a Christian, I can't accept this theory. We all know I Corinthians 13:4-7:
4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
How can love prove itself patient if there are never times of struggle? How can it prove it is kind unless there are moments of frustration? How can it be shown to not be envious, boastful, or proud unless there are instances in which these things are met? To say that love isn't real unless it is flawless is ridiculous. Any relationship, regardless of how much you think God brought you together, is still the meeting of two flawed human beings. Loving a person doesn't mean that times will never be tough, it means that you will stick it out and love each other when your partner seems unloveable. To claim that a relationship isn't worth preserving just because it isn't perfect is childish nonsense and verse 11 of that passage reminds us:
11 When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me.
Don't allow yourself to be deceived by the world's version of what true love is. You know why love is perfect in movies? Because they are characters, not real people, and their stories are scripted. The measure of real love isn't that every scenario turns out beautifully, love is real because it never fails.
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